coping mechanism

here is where innocence evaporates into an atmosphere of realism. even sleep is void of dreams. every word is stripped of sentiment. all truth is drenched in cynicism. this is self-help at its finest. subtle criticism was the only sound that poured from his father's lips. never an affirmation of love, simply a hallow embrace. a self-esteem branded by short-comings. he dressed his insecurity in an elaborate suit of pride. searching for acceptance, he finds himself between other people's sheets. he dreads sleeping alone and letting his mind wander back to the sulking child in his closet. numb and tired of sharing her heart only to have it broken, she resolved to settle things her own way. she now wears her hope on her wrists. control and feeling are welcomed back in a crimson tide. the dependable pattern has become second nature. we have taken the salvation of mankind upon ourselves. if i didn't know we were dying i might find it beatiful.

repeating childhood memories

put me on exhibit. show me off to the crowd. parade me through the streets. i share the lion's eyes. a hopeless shade of grey. looking past rusty, metal bars out onto a world of vivid color. both tamed and trademarked in a distant, corporate cubicle. the simple diversion of children's dreams is the only thing keeping this place from becoming a burial ground. all my limbs are now vestigal and the roots are creeping up and starting to swallow me. but life wasn't always so confined. the laughter outside almost conquers the silence when i think about the freedom that once covered me. i was once liberated but now ive lost my way. this maze is making me sick and each wrong turn is paved by the walls of my ever-beating heart. even if i called out to you for help, my every word would be caught between the bars of their ivory prison. my life without you is a never ending trip to the zoo.

promised land

what a perfectly, protected society we have built. we have sterilized the very air we breath. our majestic lives stand safe behind these brick walls that keep out the impressing tidal waves. the tide smashes against an impermeable barrier of concrete and dedication. the ever present sun smiles down upon our paradise as to confirm our great pride. steel and glass intertwine as they twist and climb to the heavens, piercing the motionless, blue sky. we conquer the clouds while distinction between god and a steady work ethic is quietly laid to rest. animal instinct has never been so kind to these erotic streets. pain has been made obsolete, our children have never known life without a silver spoon between their teeth. questions of existence are overwhelmed by the smell of money on our hands. all thought is drowned out by the sounds of the cockroaches in top hats. their empty scurrying resounds like thunder, it's all i hear. this betrayal has left me numb and slowly i am becoming comfortable with its consequences. today the sun set behind the skyline. night chased away the light and brought with it foreign emotions, fear and insecurity. oh how ignorant is our vanity! our once blameless wall begins to crack under the pressure. through the holes I see the stars reflecting on the water and im seeing this for what it really is, im looking past the mirage. no matter how much soap we use, we can never wash the ink from our nails, and that's why im letting go. this time I am letting the water in. finally letting the waves take me away from here.